Josh Casias, 39

Josh Casias, 39

I went to Littleton High School. I have family scattered all over Denver. I developed a drug problem after my dad left.

When I was little, I barely saw my dad. I was moving between houses a lot. I developed a mean temper. I played hockey, because in hockey you can fight and not get in trouble. After high school I tried out for the University of Denver hockey team, and I made it! But I got arrested for assault on another kid, and I spoiled that opportunity. That’s when my drug use started to pick up.

My cousin and I got busted stealing from a mall, and I got two months jail time for contributing to the delinquency of a minor. I ran away from the halfway house, so I got sent to prison in Buena Vista for five years. After I got out, I was done following anybody else’s rules.

After that life was just a blur. I’d get in a fight, go back to jail, get out, and the cycle would repeat. I’ve been out for three and a half years now – the longest I’ve been out since I was 18.

When I got out that last time, everyone was just done with me. My mom said I couldn’t come back.

That first night on the streets was scary. I fell asleep next to Hobby Lobby in Englewood. I didn’t even have shoes. But I woke up and someone had left money, a blanket and food next to me. I just started crying.

I took it as a sign from God. I started going to Café 180 and Movement 5280 and looking for ways to help myself. The blessings kept coming. People gave me shoes and a backpack.

It’s been major ups and downs since then. I was living with some squatters for a bit. If I had nowhere to go, I would just walk the streets all night. I would use meth to stay up all night. It’s safer that way, so someone can’t take advantage of you while you’re asleep. And it just kills time.

Eventually I turned myself in on a petty warrant, and they put me in a halfway house. I got a job in a restaurant. I’m still working on pulling myself up.

Places like Movement 5280 and GraceFull Café, they mean the world. If it weren’t for them, I’d be dead. They gave me food to eat and a place to be. They’re there for me on holidays. They helped me get and keep a phone. They kept me alive and kept me from doing something more drastic.

Pay attention to people on the streets. What if it was someone you love? An encouraging word or a helping hand can make someone’s day. Or week. Or year.

I have a partner now, and I’m doing my best to help provide for her and her kids. I’m trying to get back in the gym. I’m done with the streets and getting high.

The difference is I love myself now, for the first time. I hope that benefits the people I love. I don’t see life like I used to anymore.

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Well, I’m trying something different now, and I like these results.